Every Monday morning, I have a work meeting during which the team goes over individual updates from the week before. And every Monday morning in the thirty minutes leading up to this meeting, I question my career choices.
I wonder how and why I got into this field of work. I wonder if I should have given it more thought when I was fifteen. Or eighteen.
I think of the alternatives.
Over the course of the last three decades, I have considered being a mechanical engineer, gynecologist, librarian, psychologist, advertisement jingle writer, bus driver, food blogger, restaurant critic, model, theatre artist, teacher, standup comedian, photographer, stay-at-home person. The list is long, many Mondays have passed since I graduated from college.
I’ve also considered being a writer of some kind. Probably the only thing I am passionate about. And by passion, I mean an inclination to keep coming back to it, year after year.
Most weeks, by Wednesday, I am deeply focused on my work, staying up late into the night, writing and debugging code. Doing what I love about my job – building products, making things work, breaking them, fixing them.
Yet on Mondays, all I can think of are the things I dislike – the administrative work, the office politics, the drudgery behind shipping products.
I wonder if I would have felt the same way on Mondays if I had taken up writing full time? I wonder if I would have still found solace in writing as I do now, or would I have begun to dread putting words on blank pages?
I wish there was a way to peep into alternate realities. Just to see how life would have been if I had picked the other options. I wish there was a way to switch between these different realities. To live a little here, live a little there.
But one can only dream. And snap back to reality when a voice says, “Divya, do you have any updates?” to quickly say, “No. No, I don’t have any updates. I’m still trying to figure it out.”
3 thoughts on “Monday Morning Career Counseling”
I too often wonder if I’d have been a better writer by now had I not dicked around so much during my teenage years. But there’s no telling how our alternate paths would’ve turned out. What we have is now, though, so I’ve begun trying to focus on every passing moment.
Because I’m starting to learn that happiness is now, or never at all.
Wishing you the best, Divya!
That’s so true, even though focusing on now is not always easy. Thanks for reading!
Love reading your posts. They are close to reality and I am sure many people are going through the same thing.
On Sun, 28 Feb 2021, 04:04 Collected Thoughts on Parenting, wrote:
> Divya posted: ” Every Monday morning, I have a work meeting during which > the team goes over individual updates from the week before. And every > Monday morning in the thirty minutes leading up to this meeting, I question > my career choices. I wonder how and why I got in” >